Hipster Anarchists Repair Potholes

Leftist radicals have been getting a bad rap lately.  Whether they’re pepper spraying the elderly, burning shit down, or getting beaten up by Based Stick Man, it’s been a hard year for Americans dedicated to the destruction of America.

So it’s no surprise that some of Portland’s anarchists, who were particularly bent on ripping things up after President Trump’s victory, want a public-relations makeover. Enter Portland Anarchist Road Care, a new group dedicated to filling potholes and road maintenance in areas where the Democrat-controlled city government failed.

Their Facebook group describes their mission as the following:

“We believe in community oriented direct action. We believe the state cares more about funding a militarized police force to suppress free speech than caring for and repairing the roads.

The city of Portland has shown gross negligence in its inadequate preventative care through this winter’s storms, and through its slow repair of potholes as weather has improved. Daily, this negligence is an active danger to cyclists and causes damage to people’s automobiles, and an increased risk of collision and bodily injury.

Portland Anarchist Road Care aims to mobilize crews throughout our city, in our neighborhoods, to patch our streets, build community, and continue to find solutions to community problems outside of the state.”

Portland Anarchist Road Care didn’t immediately respond to requests for comment.

The group also says it’s trying to work against the stereotype of anarchists “only breaking windows and blocking roads,” which is totally unwarranted considering the more than $1 million in damage rioters caused in November. They say that so far the rebranding has been a smash success: The Facebook page has garnered 3,155 likes and, according to the group’s pictures, the group patched five potholes on SE Salmon Street on February 28.

One suggestion for bolstering your image in the future: Next time your candidate loses an election, don’t tear down your city.

Just a thought.